A painful decision

[porscheclub]

Well, bros. My time has come. Not too sure if this is a poll, a story or asking for comments. For months, I suffered & tormented for I fell in love with another women. She's all that any men would ever wanted. She's a dozen years younger, talented, good cook, takes care of me tenderly like a nurse, has a kind heart & loves kids. She is beautiful, a gem among the field & an attraction in parties. Most importantly, she loves me dearly. Sex is unbelievable but I've reached a point where it's not the must have and lived without it for more than a year.

I have lived a blessed life. My childhood days were poor, hard, single parent, scorned by classmates, bullied by neighbours & relatives distanced from us for fear of borrowing money from them. I promised myself to be a good father for I had no father love & worked even harder to prove myself. I succeeded & achieved much to have what most men would want in life, houses, fast cars, luxuries, boats & even a pilot license.

Problem is I have a family, a perfect one except that the wife I married wasn't the one I love deeply because when u work hard, there's little time to find love & I even thought of arranged marriage @ one point. And now I can only have one woman for the other wants to marry & give me what I would lose. I'm surprised that I love my children so much, so little time with them yet couldn't bear to leave them for the woman I truly love & the promise that I made since young.

If I choose my family, I'll live a lonely life & carry the love in my heart to my death bed but fulfill fatherhood. Continue my work & have a little commercial sex when the lust sets in.

If I choose my true love. I can be happier, have a new family & still be a weekend father while she promises to love them like hers. She gives me some interesting future but a path of unforseen challenges. I'm prepared to lose half to my family for they deserve it.

I'm favouring my family & my heart cries like water falling into a deep well. My other love uses tears to wash her face. It's painful.

[cablesnwires]

Dear bro porscheclub,

Decisions, decisions.....

I share your grief and sorrows. As much as it is a very complicated decision, the answer is relative simple.

Who do you love more? Your girl or your children? Live your life as it should. You are your own destiny.

If I am you, I choose children anytime. Why? They are the innocent parties and I would not want to drag my problems into the lives of our next generation.

Well, before you say it is easier to say since I AM not the one having this problem, let me say this, I KNOW exactly what you are going through... ;)

The above is based on my personal opinion. Others MMV. :)

[sammyboyfor]

Well, bros. My time has come. Not too sure if this is a poll, a story or asking for comments. For months, I suffered & tormented for I fell in love with another women. She's all that any men would ever wanted.


It's all hunky dory now but once you've lived with her for a few years, you'll find they're all the same. :rolleyes:

[DTCEPL]

If I choose my family, I'll live a lonely life & carry the love in my heart to my death bed but fulfill fatherhood. Continue my work & have a little commercial sex when the lust sets in.

If I choose my true love. I can be happier, have a new family & still be a weekend father while she promises to love them like hers. She gives me some interesting future but a path of unforseen challenges. I'm prepared to lose half to my family for they deserve it.



I will choose the family and children, a Man regardless, must take up the responsibilities which he have started, and even if he carrys with 遗憾 / regrets to his grave.....so be it.

[Fishcer]

TS, there is never a right or wrong answer, and even more definite is that you can never get an answer here. Everyone is born different, thinks different, so who can say that he is right/wrong?

There's no way u r gonna decide based on what is written by bros here...in fact if u r really asking bros here to give their opinion, what i can say is that i feel you just want to have pple supporting what u already decide, so that u have a base to justify ur choice, cos u know that there will definitely b 2 split camps, and that u can say "Look, others think the same as me, so that must mean i m not wrong"...

If ur not looking for any answers here, n just posting cos u wanna share, then i apologise...:)

[DO_YOU_BJ]

Bro PorscheClub, this was the day i remembered we once talked about.
Yes, totally agree, the children will always be the strongest bond.
Even when buddha left his wife and kid to seek enlightenment, it was his kid, Rahoula(means BOND) that made his heart unbearable.....from this, i think we can understand lots liao.

For you marrying someone you dun truely love due to official committments, trust me, i totally understand you my friend, cos we're in the same boat, heck, Y u think i ended up wif 4!
But like it or not, i made a rule that only my legal wife will bear my children, thus the curse that any women that becomes my wife or wives, will have to pay the price of never being able to bear my children...this is also a choice they have to live wif if they decide to be wif me.
Now, i dun quite agree wif your actions totally neither do i totally with all the advises the bros gave you...cos every prob will have a solution.

Yes, she's half your age blah blah.....but if she is willing to be wif you, by virtue that we both think we know who we are, you can always get her here, obtain PR status thru our influences and put her up somewhere on our island on a perm basis. Yes, a full fledged mistress. This is the path to take.

Why suggest this.......you're an eagle! You'll need your hunting flights ever so often to get your fill...thus this is the true you, also, this where your gusto or life force comes from. Clip a wing & you'll be killing yourself.....how long can you take it before you break? Well guess depends on individual.
Have a good think about what i suggest to you my friend, and i'm sure you will come up wif something that's a win win.
Need me, you know how to find me.

Remember, make a choice you wont regret and wont loose out...life is selfish.......but in this scenario, make a choice that all will benefit from it.
If you clip a wing, even your kid will feel you're like a DEAD MAN WALKING!

Take care my friend;)

[makelove]

bro, you better sit down and think over.
Family is a lifelong commitment.
Your "true love" might just be a one shot, "san fen zhong re du" relationship?

in the end, its your decision. our advice will not help

[technofreak]

I will choose the family and children, a Man regardless, must take up the responsibilities which he have started, and even if he carrys with 遗憾 / regrets to his grave.....so be it.

We share the same sentiments indeed...Be a responsible person though. Well, TS...If you really love the woman so much...I suggest you building another nest elsewhere...;)

[petrolheadsg]

bro...when I read your post, I felt as if it were me writing that albeit many years ago.

Having said that though, I agree with what some bros say ie your circumstances will be unique, there are details that will differ from mine or other bros and our advice may not be the right one for you.

Personally, I have decided that I will stick to the one that loves me most and I will and have grown to love her more each day (my wife). She has supported me through ups and downs, thick and thin, even when I strayed and hurt her.

Am I a saint? Far from it...do I play around, yes but as another brother puts it...after I am done, I only think of home. Sammyboyfor also alludes to this when he says they are all the same after some time (paraphrased). So to me the distinction is that my wife loves me the most and the feeling of loneliness is dispelled the moment this enlightenment came upon me.


If you want to vent or share you can call me out for kopi. But ultimately when you make that decision, it will be made alone.

This is your journey and only you can travel on that road. However, dont make a decision you cannot reverse out of easily...if you can hang on to your GF without sacrificing your marriage, then I suggest that you do so to give yourself some more time to think through your situation.

All the best bro

[bonk88]

Personally, I have decided that I will stick to the one that loves me most and I will and have grown to love her more each day (my wife). She has supported me through ups and downs, thick and thin, even when I strayed and hurt her.

Am I a saint? Far from it...do I play around, yes but as another brother puts it...after I am done, I only think of home. Sammyboyfor also alludes to this when he says they are all the same after some time (paraphrased). So to me the distinction is that my wife loves me the most and the feeling of loneliness is dispelled the moment this enlightenment came upon me.


If you want to vent or share you can call me out for kopi. But ultimately when you make that decision, it will be made alone.

This is your journey and only you can travel on that road. However, dont make a decision you cannot reverse out of easily...if you can hang on to your GF without sacrificing your marriage, then I suggest that you do so to give yourself some more time to think through your situation.

All the best bro

well said bro petrol, i do share the same sentiment with u too.
most important think is : in life what ever decision u make, don't regret and do not turn back too, move forward and life still have to go on bro....that a advice i can share with u....bro ST...

[geckoSG]

Bro, I'm sorry to say this thing to you also. If you really love your children.
Stay with your family. Give them your love and everything.

If your Lover is truthly sincerely in love with you, she will give you the
blessing. If she is able to live as an underground lover to you, then stay
that way, both of you get the love you wanted and still managed to give
the love to your family.

I know this is sort of cruel and selfish, but you think about it. Your family
goes thru thick and thin with you. There's time when squabbling will happen.
That's true family.

In lover situation, you always gives each other the sweets, but when you
stay together for a while, trust me, it will be the same as family. Talk to her,
and see if you could work out something, else, better to split now...

[jojogigi]

give yourself this question. who is really gonna go through thick and thin with you? Very impt. Ur choice will depend whether u die on ur deathbed alone or with someone in your arms. my own opinion. you dictate your life.

[DO_YOU_BJ]

give yourself this question. who is really gonna go through thick and thin with you? Very impt. Ur choice will depend whether u die on ur deathbed alone or with someone in your arms. my own opinion. you dictate your life.

Hey, this sounds very familiar!
我： 你爱我吗？
她： 我不知道。
我： 你爱我吗？
她： 我爱你。
我： 你神经病！！！

[ekemono]

I promised myself to be a good father...

...If I choose my true love. I can be happier,

Can you tell me what is a good father? Your happiness comes first or your children's happiness comes first?

Did your own children raise both hands in full support of you to end the marriage with their biological mother cos they figure out they can better love the future step mother?
How trusting can you be towards your new found beau when the day comes that she has to discipline your biological children?
Can you guarantee she gives equal treatment towards all the children when the day she bores you a child?
Will all your heart felt problems end and blissful life starts the day you collect the Decree Nisi? Nobody except your wife will feel hurt?

I am not trying to challenge or insult you TS. I am a divorcee myself with a child that seriously lack a complete family and as I read you love your children so much, I made an effort to this queries?

End of the day, its your life, your choice.

[jasdude]

torn btw love and responsibilities ! i am a divorcée too ! love ages and materializes into responsibilities that a couple have to shoulder to each other . especially when kids come into the picture .

A fact is that the woman you now love may not be the woman you can live with like your wife . She maybe the one now but not be the one that will last . Don't be blindsided . like my grandfather said to me before i got divorced . Your wife is only your wife once the coffin has being nailed shut ! Life is unpredictable . A bird in hand is better than the one in the bush .

[jojogigi]

Hey, this sounds very familiar!
我： 你爱我吗？
她： 我不知道。
我： 你爱我吗？
她： 我爱你。
我： 你神经病！！！

i put so long now then u see ah? from a jedi master lo.....

[porscheclub]

Who do you love more? Your girl or your children? Live your life as it should. You are your own destiny.


Sad to say I love them all. Actually, I spend very little time with my kids & I thought I could leave them but I gave myself some time to be with them. The daughter always make my heart melt. Unfortunately we just can't have everything in life.

Yes, I believe in making my own destiny even though I check on my fortuneteller often. But this time, it's drawing a blank.

It's all hunky dory now but once you've lived with her for a few years, you'll find they're all the same. :rolleyes:

Yes, I would want to believe what u said it's true. It's honeymoon period now. yeah?

I will choose the family and children, a Man regardless, must take up the responsibilities which he have started, and even if he carrys with 遗憾 / regrets to his grave.....so be it.

Agree. That's why I'm having a tough time for the last few months.


There's no way u r gonna decide based on what is written by bros here...in fact if u r really asking bros here to give their opinion, what i can say is that i feel you just want to have pple supporting what u already decide, so that u have a base to justify ur choice, cos u know that there will definitely b 2 split camps, and that u can say "Look, others think the same as me, so that must mean i m not wrong"...

Actually, I see many intelligent people here with lots of experiences to share. I'm sure many of the seniors here would have gone through what I'm going through now.

[porscheclub]

Bro PorscheClub, this was the day i remembered we once talked about.
Yes, she's half your age blah blah.....but if she is willing to be wif you, by virtue that we both think we know who we are, you can always get her here, obtain PR status thru our influences and put her up somewhere on our island on a perm basis. Yes, a full fledged mistress. This is the path to take.

Why suggest this.......you're an eagle! You'll need your hunting flights ever so often to get your fill...thus this is the true you, also, this where your gusto or life force comes from. Clip a wing & you'll be killing yourself.....how long can you take it before you break? Well guess depends on individual.
Have a good think about what i suggest to you my friend, and i'm sure you will come up wif something that's a win win.
Need me, you know how to find me.

Remember, make a choice you wont regret and wont loose out...life is selfish.......but in this scenario, make a choice that all will benefit from it.
If you clip a wing, even your kid will feel you're like a DEAD MAN WALKING!

Take care my friend;)

Bro, we've both never expected to go so deep together. We've lived together on/off for 10 months now. Never expected to have a mistress either. Aiya one thing led to another. I'm actually getting her an S pass today but pulled the handbrake because once she's here on a 2yr contract & subsequent PR. That's it.

She doesn't want to be the mistress & I don't want the mess either, I'm not suave as you leh. Anyway, this one confirm not after my money either, cos I don't have much anyway & her mum's paying for her permit now.

Actually, I'd rather she's older & more matured.

Yeah you're right. Dead man walking...... I can imagine that & I've not put much heart into women for a long time but this one hurts.

Eagle? u wise man

[RTTO]

Bro, ask yourself this - are you here to seek advise or here hoping a couple of bros would encourage you to leave your family for the gal?

You probably subconciously know which path to choose but just want to get more people to support your decision. I had a similar plight couple of years back..... i was my gf's weekday office hour man and once after office hour, weekend and public holidays, I am back to my good father/husband status. We (gf and I) were so lovey dovey and I told her I am going to divorce my wife and my kids will understand when they grow up and that they will give us their blessings blar blar blar...... honeymoon period, Bro.

Soon after a year, i got bored and tired and i finally realized that it was lust i was chasing after all these while. I gotta constantly find time during office hr to be with her... makan, sex, shopping, sex, watch movie, sex, sex sex.... Then sometimes i also worried that OC at night might be horny and look for me. If i cannot perform, donno how to answer. Everytime after sex with my gf, the first thing that comes to my mind is FAMILY! GO HOME! My kids told me FAMILY stands for Father And Mother I Love You! You wanted to be a good father becos of your lack of father's love during your younger days... but look at what you are intending to do to your kids?

Also, when you are emotionally tied to someone, you can't think probably. The flame will died down someday and you might just fall for another perfect gal of your life. Perhaps it's communication problem you and your wife faced. I used to think I dun love my wife... lame excuses. When i put in the effort to communicatte with my wife, I realized the problem lies with me. I didn't put in enuf effort to communicate with her.

So fortunately this relationship with my gf is over.... so I am now back to my family :) AND I AM VERY GLAD I DID NOT LEAVE MY FAMILY AND CHOSE TO BE WITH MY GF!

That's why nowadays, i go for paid sex.... no emotional setback, just a transaction.

[aakumu]

Hi bro,
I just have to asked, if the woman concern is she a normal girl or a working girl?
Some bro here said something about PR for here?
I wanted to point out if it is a FL/WL or whatever your call it, then forget it. If it is a normal girl, I will still take the children over the girl.
When the time comes and your kids are grown and gone, I am sure you will all the time to be with her; now all your effort should be on raising your children and giving them the best.

My humble two cents.

[slider_72]

I actually started off wanting to tell you to stick to your wife and kids. But you know what? After writing for a while, I deleted everything. How can anyone not in your position tell you to either forgo your love or give up your family? It is a really difficult position you are in and I feel sorry for you.

Before you decide, have you considered why you say she is not after your money? Apart from money, could be other needs like getting the S Pass and the eventual PR.

[porscheclub]

bro...when I read your post, I felt as if it were me writing that albeit many years ago.

Having said that though, I agree with what some bros say ie your circumstances will be unique, there are details that will differ from mine or other bros and our advice may not be the right one for you.

If you want to vent or share you can call me out for kopi. But ultimately when you make that decision, it will be made alone.

All the best bro

Gam xia bro. Haven't met up for quite a while now.


Did your own children raise both hands in full support of you to end the marriage with their biological mother cos they figure out they can better love the future step mother?


Thank you sir. No, the children will remain with the mum. I gave her 2 maids, a car & an apt. I'll still remain as what I've always been = a weekend papa. In fact, I think it's my fault for pampering the wife too much. Anyway, I'll still bring the kids out on weekends as usual & even with the mum along as well & the 2nd wife has agreed to this arrangement. We'll still take the children on holidays too.

[applepie99]

TS, you didn't share with us which nationality she's from. Anyway, do you think she's going to make a difference if you were to leave your current wife and marry her? Think carefully, after a few years, the sparks will go off, and you'll probably find her no difference from your current wife. How long have you been seeing her? 10 months? That is not long enough...maybe 3 years before you make a decision. If I'm you, I would just married once, and be a playboy for the rest of my life. Remember that they are from Venus and they are going to behave the same, whether they are from Singapore, Malaysia or China.

[porscheclub]

Hi bro,
I just have to asked, if the woman concern is she a normal girl or a working girl?

Yes, thanks for looking into this. She's not a W/L or F/L but still a PRC. I've done background checks & lived with the family.

Bro, ask yourself this - are you here to seek advise or here hoping a couple of bros would encourage you to leave your family for the gal?

Thanks! Very good insight. I would like to hear from you guys with similar experience. Mine has gone pass the sex issue & we've been living together. Her family actually objected @ 1st knowing that I have a family but she's too much in love with me so they finally gave blessings.


Before you decide, have you considered why you say she is not after your money? Apart from money, could be other needs like getting the S Pass and the eventual PR.

Thank you bro, u've been very understanding & thanks for your concerns too. I've grilled her many times on all these issues & she's quite pitiful actually. Because, everytime I read something here, I'll test her. :p

[DO_YOU_BJ]

Bro, we've both never expected to go so deep together. We've lived together on/off for 10 months now. Never expected to have a mistress either. Aiya one thing led to another. I'm actually getting her an S pass today but pulled the handbrake because once she's here on a 2yr contract & subsequent PR. That's it.
My brudder, its something like i started my initial post to you long ago when this surfaced, you sure????? Remember?
Well its at that stage now? Confusion, sorry but sadly, cannot be in that stage anymore liao...the stage has been set, the movie has started. You know her best but also you must still be focused. U must be in entire control of everything. You have reached the point of no return.
Now is to really really sit down and PLAN for everything liao. No more test water. All decisions made will be very impacting to all parties involved.

She doesn't want to be the mistress & I don't want the mess either, I'm not suave as you leh. Anyway, this one confirm not after my money either, cos I don't have much anyway & her mum's paying for her permit now.
Not wanting to be mistress and wanting to be number 1 can be a real prob. Why not? Think carefully about this and understand their culture as compared to ours. This one worries me. Like u said in another post, car, 2 maids and a roof. Bro, too fast for so much. Question, house as discussed earlier rented, bot under your name or hers? Very important.
Suave is not the matter here, it's how you view and manage your own world my brudder.

Actually, I'd rather she's older & more matured.
Think if that happened, you may not in this stage now ya.....
Yeah you're right. Dead man walking...... I can imagine that & I've not put much heart into women for a long time but this one hurts.
Remember your old posts to me about my number 4? You're in the same position now that i was in then. So my friend, time to make a stand & make your call!

Eagle? u wise man
This one cant be wrong one, cos the tot of clipping my wing actually scared me. My point of reference, my father in law. A full fledged dead man walking...wife can nag nag and he like numb.....then wife can call him, LAO EH, i toking to you leh!!! His reply....ah?????
I dun ever want to end up like that...real sad sight....so i decided to run my life. Do not take this path cos you'll loose you and you'll loose your drive in many aspects in life....better off dead

[porscheclub]

My brudder, its something like i started my initial post to you long ago when this surfaced, you sure????? Remember?
Well its at that stage now? Confusion, sorry but sadly, cannot be in that stage anymore liao...the stage has been set, the movie has started. You know her best but also you must still be focused. U must be in entire control of everything. You have reached the point of no return.
Now is to really really sit down and PLAN for everything liao. No more test water. All decisions made will be very impacting to all parties involved.

Yes SIR. FOCUS.... & the next 72 hrs is very trying.

Not wanting to be mistress and wanting to be number 1 can be a real prob. Why not? Think carefully about this and understand their culture as compared to ours. This one worries me. Like u said in another post, car, 2 maids and a roof. Bro, too fast for so much. Question, house as discussed earlier rented, bot under your name or hers? Very important.
Suave is not the matter here, it's how you view and manage your own world my brudder.

OOps sorry. Misunderstanding here. The maids, car & apt is for my existing wife.

The 2nd one washes my clothes with her bare hands & washing machine. Does the ironing too :D

This one cant be wrong one, cos the tot of clipping my wing actually scared me. My point of reference, my father in law. A full fledged dead man walking...wife can nag nag and he like numb.....then wife can call him, LAO EH, i toking to you leh!!! His reply....ah?????
I dun ever want to end up like that...real sad sight....so i decided to run my life. Do not take this path cos you'll loose you and you'll loose your drive in many aspects in life....better off dead

Yeah, reminds me of my uncle indeed. He held on because of the children & the wife nagged him all his life. Now that the kids are all grown up, he's leading his own life.

[colins]

Bro porscheclub, you come across as a successful person in your career. But in terms of relationships, sounds like you tend to make big decisions unconsciously. Maybe your defination of a good life involves largely around being successful in what you lack in your younger days, but if you really see what you lack now, your decision can be much clearer. To me, none of your choices will provide what you lack. You will still meet this kind of situation even with your 'new partner' in the future.

Its hard to let go of the past, becos in certain ways, we always fulfil ourselves with only what we think we lack in the past. If that has become what we live for, then bro, the present and future will seem to be very confusing.

In short, you still haven't found out what you want in life.

[cablesnwires]

Dear bro porscheclub,

You need to be very clear. Your grounds for divorce is not strong. Let me ask you this: If this lady did not appear in your life, would you still proceed with the divorce? No?

When your children was borne, and looking at them while carrying them in your arms, what were you thinking?

Can you really look straight at your kids' eyes, after you are divorced, if you decide to divorce?

Kinda remind me when someone posts this question to me: Who do you save in a fire when time only permits you to save one, wife or mother?

[justl00king]

Bro,

Live life with no regrets! And just do whatever makes you feel happy and alive! :D

Hard for another to pass comments as only you know best what's right for ya.
Just remember what you decide now will affect what gonna happen in future.

All the best!!! :)

[porscheclub]

Its hard to let go of the past, becos in certain ways, we always fulfil ourselves with only what we think we lack in the past. If that has become what we live for, then bro, the present and future will seem to be very confusing.

In short, you still haven't found out what you want in life.

Wow this has to be best post! Do we actually know what we want in life?

I have never stopped to think about this.

Incidentally, I love U2's I still haven't found what I've been looking for.

[porscheclub]

Dear bro porscheclub,

You need to be very clear. Your grounds for divorce is not strong. Let me ask you this: If this lady did not appear in your life, would you still proceed with the divorce? No?


To be frank, may not now but possibly later. She's the catalyst & I told her I'm prepared to lose both. The marriage life has no sex & inter-family relationship is not @ it's best since day one. The in-laws can't see eye to eye as usual. The only thing that kept me going was when I look @ my kids jumping happily before me when I'm home.

[pussyjuicy]

Bro TS, do think carefully, sometimes the patch of grass may look green but after a period of time, the color will fade. That's life which we are in, we have everything in life now but somehow still not contented.:)

[HCKing]

To be frank, may not now but possibly later. She's the catalyst & I told her I'm prepared to lose both. The marriage life has no sex & inter-family relationship is not @ it's best since day one. The in-laws can't see eye to eye as usual. The only thing that kept me going was when I look @ my kids jumping happily before me when I'm home.

tis section getting more n more fun, day in day out c alot of so called KC lao jiao/guru/expert/master busy giving their 2 ct. problem is, will all these diff voices just make the TS more blur?

frm the way i look at it TS u r just bored with all the responsibilities of routine marriage life and wants to take a break lah. not to pour cold water to yr new found love but i can tell u it's all the same no matter wat girl u settle down with the honeymoon part will ends in no time and all the responsibilities shit will come back again.

like wat colin says the important thing 4 u is to ask yrself wat u really want in life lah.

my 2 ct.:p

[cablesnwires]

.....

The only thing that kept me going was when I look @ my kids jumping happily before me when I'm home.

I know, that kind of feeling is priceless, especially when you hear their little voices said "I miss you daddy...."

[bhoven]

To be frank, may not now but possibly later. She's the catalyst & I told her I'm prepared to lose both. The marriage life has no sex & inter-family relationship is not @ it's best since day one. The in-laws can't see eye to eye as usual. The only thing that kept me going was when I look @ my kids jumping happily before me when I'm home.

My guess is that you did not have much time to play the field earlier cos you were concentrating on your career. Probably your wife may have been your first serious gf. At the same time, the kids came early in the marriage and your wife was busy being mom and also looking after the home...so you both drifted apart. Do not be too concerned about the in-laws...both you and your wife have a right to live the life you want...In this scenario when a syt comes along and pampers you, it is easy to fall in love all over again. Since your married sex life was too routine, the passion with your new gf would have been very refreshing and caused you regret that you did not experienced the same when in your earlier married life. Trust me, the feeling will soon wear off and you will soon not be on cloud nine. Not that I think your new gf is insincere but she may not now realise that being a second wife and foster mother is no easy task. Before long she will yearn to have her own children and to lead a normal married life...not that of a mistress. This is when you find that things will really get complicated especially since you are so attached to your children now. Think carefully before you decide...the future continued happiness of a few human beings are in your hands...

Apologies for playing amateur psychologist...forgive me if my various assumptions were way out.

[porscheclub]

Apologies for playing amateur psychologist...forgive me if my various assumptions were way out.

No sir, please do.

Actually, the mistress wants marriage & children, to give me what i would lose & also be foster mum over weekends.

I'm quite terrible. The wife is definitely not the first love & I had "bao" KTV gals some 7/8yrs ago. But when I got married, left all of em for good. Actually, I had an acct with SBF in 02/3 but lost the details.

[flowerpot]

bro porscheclub,

so your decision is made? u have choosen the 2nd one???

im in the same situation as you, with this gf for 18 months,
frankly speaking, i used to love my wife before she appear in my life...

but this lady knows how to make a man feel like a man. not in term of sex...
like you, she is also not a WL nor FL.
like you, sex is not what i need from her....

my marriage has been on the rock since her appearence, til now, i still have not make any decision...

for choosing my wife and child, i know i will regret giving up such a wonderful lady...

for choosing her, its really hard for me to abandon my child...

truthfully, its my child that is holding my wife and me back...
but i know my wife is also undergoing unbearable torture, since my heart is not with her anymore... but for the sake of our child, she is still waiting for me to make a decision.....

I have been avoiding her, my wife..... going home late everyday, like 3-4am, and wake up after she left for work.....

What should I do????? I am Loss too.............. Help me... can i follow your decision????

[colins]

Wow this has to be best post! Do we actually know what we want in life?

I have never stopped to think about this.

Incidentally, I love U2's I still haven't found what I've been looking for.

One of the most common attitudes we apply to life is to seek a chance to start anew. Your postings are very clear, and I see that now you will never let go of this other woman. Your problem is with your inner self (i.e. to be a 'bad' guy but yet finding a way to reconcile with yourself that you are indeed, not a 'bad' person). You know that facts will show otherwise (that you are indeed 'bad') cos your children appeals to your conscience. If you have no children, you would not feel the contrast between having to hurt an innocent party and to fulfil your own selfish needs.

For any other guys, I would tell them, dun try ways to lie to yourself. If bad, means bad, they will be proven cos your family will suffer. Dun need to find ways to tell yourself that they will not suffer having only a weekend daddy and not a complete family.

But for you bro, ask yourself are you applying this attitude to always wanting to start afresh and from there, try to undo your perceived wrong doings to your ex-family. All making up action and redemption will never be sufficient to cover what you cannot give in the past. Accept that as a fact. Accept that as a price to pay in order go with this new woman. In all your postings, you haven't say the problem in your current family. That is a prove that you do not really want to solve them but want to hide them into your inner closet. You believe that one day when you are free and stronger (becos of the new found lifestyle you want), you will take a little out from this closet and try to make it up. You also believe this is a plausible solution after picking your most likely choice. This is 逃避, again said many times over in this thread.

But bro, how many things are already in your inner closet? How many things in our lives that we can run away from and prepared to run away from? Solve your marriage problems first. For all your know, it might be just somewhere in time somebody said some wrong words which started some avalanche of uncertainty. That is how weak we humans are if we dun know what we want in life. We look into very small things, make big decisions that have unimportant objectives, get upset over things least on our priority list, when we dun know what the fuck we are living for. If we dun know that, we are forever stuck within this cycle of bad decisions and redemption. We dun even know what is right and what is wrong.

Nobody gives you an SOP for life and you can never tender a resignation or wind up the business. Life is one big task that will only end at our death bed. No such thing as starting afresh without having history. If its time to pass judgements, do it. Face it. Then it will not trouble you ever again. This is how you can take judgements from people, esp when your children grow up and see you, assess you, compare you from an adult standpoint. If they see you as a heartless cad willing to give up a family, so be it. If they see you as a good loving father who sacrificed his real love to be that kind of father, dun be too happy. In life, nobody will give you all the clappings you deserve, cos there is no such thing as a richly deserved reward. You will always get the short end if you only want to be recognised as a good husband or father. Nobody recognises you cos its your bloody role in the first place. You dun want that role, drop it. You still want the role, take it fully. After that, no complain and no compliment will sway you.

What more can you give your children? What more can you give your wife? What more can you give your girlfriend? Isn't this what you have in mind cos there is only one you? So many roles to play, are there room for happiness for yourself? There is one common thing in all these roles, think about it.

[demonhunter]

Ask Yourself this question ... Did you liked growing up without a father ???
yes you may still be around on weekends ...but its like growing up without a mother on weekends then ....You should know the feeling better than anyone else .

You took the oath ...for better or for WORSE .How bad could it be ??? she may not be young and sexy anymore but thats the result she got from giving you your pride and joy , YOUR KIDS .

She gave you something ,why fuck up her life ??? i guess shes not young anymore.... what has she done to deserve this >???? Just because the companion of a SYT feels good ? then the answer is go commercial sex , KTV etc . play all you want , know where is the line, and not to cross , at the end of the day , go home .

picture this , a close friend asked you to join his newly founded company as GM .You build and run the company for a few years and made a lot of money for the company . Your monthly salary is 15K . then 1 day, your very own close friend decides to terminate your services for no reason .HE employs a young graduate with 5 yrs experience and pays him 4 k a month .Now say you are almost touching 50 yrs old already and dont really know where to go from here ....How would you feel ????

after being used , get dump . This is how the woman who bore your kids would feel .

So i hope you would think logically before making a decision . All SYT will eventually become old .Dont let your kids down , they will one day mature and know what the fuck their father has done .. dont let them hate you .

Sorry for my poor english , O level only ..

Cheers !

[sammyboyfor]

but this lady knows how to make a man feel like a man.

If you need some lady to make you feel like a man, you obviously have some serious self esteem problems.

I suggest you seek professional help.:eek:

[sammyboyfor]

The root cause of all these "lovey dovey painful decision" problems is the fact that some people obviously have too much time on their hands. :rolleyes:

As the saying goes.."an idle mind is the Devil's workshop"! Instead of spending your leisure hours thinking of love, lust and pussy in general, why not take up a hobby, a sport , go scuba diving, learn to paint.. whatever tickles your fancy and gives you satisfaction of a non sexual nature.

Once you've filled your day with meaningful pursuits, most problems of the heart will evaporate before your very eyes!

For the last 15 years, I've had ONE girlfriend and that's it. Best of all, we're still together. My daily grind involves :

1) Maintaining all my websites - 3 hours
2) Cooking, cleaning, gardening - 2 hours
3) Shopping for necessities.. food, household items etc - 1 hour
4) Bike ride - 3 hours (keep fit plus training for my next bike race).
5) Lunch with friends - 2 hours.
6) Yoga - 45 minutes to 1 hour (relaxation time).
7) Taking care of finances - 30 minutes (pay bills on line, transfers, balancing accounts)

That leaves me with just enough time to get a good night's sleep before a new dawn arrives.

I don't have the time to mess up my mind getting involved with other pussies and I'm fine with that.

The key to a happy life is to keep things simple. ;)

[HCKing]

The root cause of all these "lovey dovey painful decision" problems is the fact that some people obviously have too much time on their hands. :rolleyes:

As the saying goes.."an idle mind is the Devil's workshop"! Instead of spending your leisure hours thinking of love, lust and pussy in general, why not take up a hobby, a sport , go scuba diving, learn to paint.. whatever tickles your fancy and gives you satisfaction of a non sexual nature.

Once you've filled your day with meaningful pursuits, most problems of the heart will evaporate before your very eyes!

For the last 15 years, I've had ONE girlfriend and that's it. Best of all, we're still together. My daily grind involves :

1) Maintaining all my websites - 3 hours
2) Cooking, cleaning, gardening - 2 hours
3) Shopping for necessities.. food, household items etc - 1 hour
4) Bike ride - 3 hours (keep fit plus training for my next bike race).
5) Lunch with friends - 2 hours.
6) Yoga - 45 minutes to 1 hour (relaxation time).
7) Taking care of finances - 30 minutes (pay bills on line, transfers, balancing accounts)

That leaves me with just enough time to get a good night's sleep before a new dawn arrives.

I don't have the time to mess up my mind getting involved with other pussies and I'm fine with that.

The key to a happy life is to keep things simple. ;)

well said. a good and positive lifestyle is still the best. dont see life as just money and woman and u will not fall offtrack.

[slider_72]

well said. a good and positive lifestyle is still the best. dont see life as just money and woman and u will not fall offtrack.

True, but how many can sustain that type of lifestyle that the BOSS subscribed to? In the begining, most men may be able to, but after a period of time, say 10 years after marriage, how many can keep to it?

Who knows, perhaps that day may come when instead of spending three hour with his bum glued onto the seat of a bike, the BOSS spends 3 hours holed up in an Aussie motel with the bum of a PRC SYT glued onto him.

Nothing is impossible in this world. ;)

[Fatjumbo]

It's all hunky dory now but once you've lived with her for a few years, you'll find they're all the same. :rolleyes:

Dear Boss,

Agreed 100%...back to same old story and same problem will resurface.

[EtherC]

Great advice Sam.

[HCKing]

True, but how many can sustain that type of lifestyle that the BOSS subscribed to? In the begining, most men may be able to, but after a period of time, say 10 years after marriage, how many can keep to it?

Who knows, perhaps that day may come when instead of spending three hour with his bum glued onto the seat of a bike, the BOSS spends 3 hours holed up in an Aussie motel with the bum of a PRC SYT glued onto him.

Nothing is impossible in this world. ;)

porseeber also but if yr lifestyle or habit is positive chances r u will nt make the wrong choice or choose to bury yrself in wine and sex to escape reality. in the case of TS he already said he has little time for his family and children liao if he can have a positive lifestyle, try spend more time with them, go for family activities on wkends i believe things will turn positive very soon. but instead of doing these he is now thinking of leaving them all behind for another woman to escape reality. i feel sorry for his children actually. hai.....

[sammyboyfor]

Nothing is impossible in this world. ;)

Nothing is impossible but life is what you make it. We are all capable of making conscientious choices that determine our destinies.

I have to point out that I ENJOY what I do. It gives me a sense of satisfaction and fulfillment.

I'm not preaching abstinence either. Sex with the same person does get a bit boring after a while but even if I did find someone else, things would be back to square one after a time so what's the point of causing unnecessary upheavals in ones life only to end up with nothing to be gained over the long term?

[porscheclub]

U know guys. I see more intelligent people here than many other places & many with a conscience or responsibilities as u said it.

I am not "dumping" my kids & escaping from it. My priority is their well being & I know I cannot give them the time so the mother will have them. Should she not want them, I will gladly have them & my mum will be a very happy lady. Other than weekends, I can visit them as and when I can make it.

The 2nd wife is very understanding, she has promised to take care of them as her own and we will also have our own. We'll be fair to all & time+love is to split between two families or I will not walk.

I don't hate my current wife nor do we have squabbles. It's just that the love is non existent & the mood is grey. Can you married guys live with a woman u do not love for the rest of your life?

In any case, the decision has not been made.

If I survive this round, there will not be another woman to thug my heart. There may be little SYTs, flings or whatever but they will not thug the heart.

[slider_72]

I am not "dumping" my kids & escaping from it. My priority is their well being & I know I cannot give them the time so the mother will have them.

With all due respect, this statement is wholly contradictory to what you are planning to do.

If your priority is the children's well-being, you will want to sacrifice your own happiness in order that they can have theirs. I am sure no child wants to grow up in a family where the parents are split apart, where they get to see mummy on weekdays and daddy on weekends. No amount of love or pampering from your so-called '2nd wife' will be able to compensate for what they will miss from their biological mother.

If your priority is really your children's well-being, you will endure a life stuck with a woman whom you do not hate nor love so that your children can grow up in a proper family unit with the combined attention of both father and mother.

No dude, your priority is your own well-being. By calling the other woman your 2nd wife, it seems that you have already decided on what you want, and what you want is more in line with your own happiness. How does a divorce contribute towards the children's well-being? By letting the mother have custody, care and control over the children with restricted rights of access to you mean that you are providing for the children's well-being?

Think of it this way, the mother will have to take time to prepare the children for school during weekdays, attending to their homework after class, ensuring that they have proper dinner on their table everyday even though she may be working in the day as well. She would probably have to be the bad guy in disciplining the children when they are misbehaving.

On weekends, what would you do? Take them out for outings, picnics, etc, no need to supervise their homework, letting them sleep late because it is the weekend, giving them more leeway when they are misbehaving because it is the weekend and children are entitled to have fun during the weekend.

I think you are actually getting a better deal. Lets face it, your thoughts and plans are actually very selfish. If you accept that and are prepared to face the consequences, I have nothing further to add. However, if you think you are trying your best to cater to the well-being of your children, you are solely mistaken my friend.

[porscheclub]

bro porscheclub,

so your decision is made? u have choosen the 2nd one???

im in the same situation as you, with this gf for 18 months,
frankly speaking, i used to love my wife before she appear in my life...

but this lady knows how to make a man feel like a man. not in term of sex...
like you, she is also not a WL nor FL.
like you, sex is not what i need from her....

my marriage has been on the rock since her appearence, til now, i still have not make any decision...

for choosing my wife and child, i know i will regret giving up such a wonderful lady...

for choosing her, its really hard for me to abandon my child...

truthfully, its my child that is holding my wife and me back...
but i know my wife is also undergoing unbearable torture, since my heart is not with her anymore... but for the sake of our child, she is still waiting for me to make a decision.....

I have been avoiding her, my wife..... going home late everyday, like 3-4am, and wake up after she left for work.....

What should I do????? I am Loss too.............. Help me... can i follow your decision????

Terok, another me? Now, I'm not in the position to help you nor should you follow my decision. Every case is different & it's your life.

I used to do what u do, like going home late or so & I rented another apt with the other one. U're in the "escaping mode" now.

So, your wife knows about this? Then, it's about time to face it my friend. Sit down without the kid & talk about it. Is your 2nd one worth it? Will you have a future with her?

I'm actually letting go of my love for the sake of the kids but the 2nd one is trying very very hard to win me back. I'm in good terms with her family & her mum is like my friend while I also like her city & will invest there later.

PM me if u like & we can kopi. It's good to talk, I realised that a few other friends are facing or faced almost the same situations like us. Some divorced & are actually leading a happier life now. In fact, one even became better friend with the ex-wife.

Again, it voices down to different family situations. The issue is don't drag this too long or you're wasting everyone's time & it's a painful one.

Now, if only we can all be a good "manager" like Bro DYBJ :D

[slider_72]

Now, if only we can all be a good "manager" like Bro DYBJ :D

Now that is a class act all by iteself. Not for us mere mortals to replicate. ;)

[petrolheadsg]

U know guys. I see more intelligent people here than many other places & many with a conscience or responsibilities as u said it.

I am not "dumping" my kids & escaping from it. My priority is their well being & I know I cannot give them the time so the mother will have them. Should she not want them, I will gladly have them & my mum will be a very happy lady. Other than weekends, I can visit them as and when I can make it.

The 2nd wife is very understanding, she has promised to take care of them as her own and we will also have our own. We'll be fair to all & time+love is to split between two families or I will not walk.

I don't hate my current wife nor do we have squabbles. It's just that the love is non existent & the mood is grey. Can you married guys live with a woman u do not love for the rest of your life?


Oh btw ...sammyboyfor also mentioned something that I agree with as well...about having too much time on ones hands. Getting a new hobby is a good suggestion.
Ever tried drifting a Porsche before and getting good at it :-) Well now is as good a time as any to find out...get a manual though :-)



In any case, the decision has not been made.

If I survive this round, there will not be another woman to thug my heart. There may be little SYTs, flings or whatever but they will not thug the heart.

Bro ...man this is so deja vu....I walked to the brink but pulled back. My wife loved me so much at the time, she was willing to accept me having a 2nd wife. I am glad I did not go through with it.

I digress...

I need to ask you this. Have you ever loved your wife. You dont have to answer now or post this. Bring yourself back to the time when you made the decision to marry her, your courting days, the first time you made love like rabbits, the "stolen" moments away from her parents :-)

I ask this because I recall me telling my wife (when I was involved with this other woman) that I did not love her anymore and I also told my mum that too. At that time, the flaming passion of a new fire burned so bright that everything else dimmed ...and lust certainly masqueraded itself as love.

I too cannot live with a person I do not love...I used this very phrase itself ...and I believed it too...at the time. And no one can say that I was lying because that was truly how I felt deep inside. I dont know how much your wife loves you or what obstacles stand in your path to make your marriage work. Perhaps there is just too much "noise" that is getting in the way of reconciliation. It is difficult to internalize what experts say about finding that loving feeling again (with your wife) , but when you do, you know that it swells from within and not something that is purely cognitive or intellectual. I agree, you cant force it, it cant be manufactured or contrived...just wont work.

I liken it to learning to ride a bicycle...you hear, you see, you try but you dont really know what it is until everything clicks into place...and then you have the feeling and know what riding is.

It took me a long time to revive that and part of my journey required me to OD on cheonging to truly understand (not at the intellectual level) and internalize the conviction that lust and love are two different things entirely.

I was also lucky that my wife "waited" for me to come to my senses and she too grew stronger and discovered other aspects of her character and became more independent.

That's why in my earlier post I refer to your situation as part of a "journey".

I just wish you all the best and also thank you for sharing your circumstances with us. I guess this has been therapy not only for you but us posters as well.

Oh btw I agree with Sammyboyfor on another thing...that time on the hands leads to nothing but trouble. Getting a new hobby is a great suggestion. Ever tried drifting a Porsche and getting good at it :-) Well now is as good a time to find out as any....tip get a manual with lsd though and a WIDE OPEN SPACE ...heheh

[Absolute]

Hard to accept but nevertheless true: This girl ""loves you because you have the financial means, not because you are a nice and caring person.

This girl does not love you if you are nice and caring but old and penniless. Understand now?

But the harsh reality is always difficult to accept.

[porscheclub]

Bro ...man this is so deja vu....
Oh btw I agree with Sammyboyfor on another thing...that time on the hands leads to nothing but trouble.

Yes, thank u bro. Thanks for sharing as well & I'm glad for you that you're leading a better life now. Your wife has been most understanding.

Oh about that free time. Sam's right to a certain extent, living down under has a different pace & no much meimeis to lure him :D

Problem is I have too much hobbies, I still have a stripped out DC5 trackcar in KL for Sepang days. Oh shit! haven't look @ it for 6months now...

[xyz1001]

My wife loved me so much at the time, she was willing to accept me having a 2nd wife.

That's why in my earlier post I refer to your situation as part of a "journey".


Bro petrolheadsg, very nice post. Couldn't agree more. Kudos. :)

[HCKing]

U know guys. I see more intelligent people here than many other places & many with a conscience or responsibilities as u said it.

I am not "dumping" my kids & escaping from it. My priority is their well being & I know I cannot give them the time so the mother will have them. Should she not want them, I will gladly have them & my mum will be a very happy lady. Other than weekends, I can visit them as and when I can make it.

The 2nd wife is very understanding, she has promised to take care of them as her own and we will also have our own. We'll be fair to all & time+love is to split between two families or I will not walk.

I don't hate my current wife nor do we have squabbles. It's just that the love is non existent & the mood is grey. Can you married guys live with a woman u do not love for the rest of your life?

In any case, the decision has not been made.

If I survive this round, there will not be another woman to thug my heart. There may be little SYTs, flings or whatever but they will not thug the heart.

hehehehe TS i can see u r oredi tio KC very the deep liao frm the way u describe yr 2nd wife until super tok kong. tis kind of situation very hard to give adviCe lah its really up to u liao. if really cant make up yr mind want try flip a coin and see? head for head and tail for heart? :D

[colins]

hehehehe TS i can see u r oredi tio KC very the deep liao frm the way u describe yr 2nd wife until super tok kong. tis kind of situation very hard to give adviCe lah its really up to u liao. if really cant make up yr mind want try flip a coin and see? head for head and tail for heart? :D

Reminds me of this scene in 暗战2, when Ekin lured the police to the roof top. The negotiator came and Ekin again lured him to play this coin flipping game with him. For 30plus tries the negotiator guessed 'heads' and for all the tries, the results were always 'words'. This scene shows a lot on human nature. Sometimes we just do not want to face the truth, in the end we can't face the truth anymore. The sad fact is, there are people who rather die or lose themselves than to face it.

[HCKing]

Reminds me of this scene in 暗战2, when Ekin lured the police to the roof top. The negotiator came and Ekin again lured him to play this coin flipping game with him. For 30plus tries the negotiator guessed 'heads' and for all the tries, the results were always 'words'. This scene shows a lot on human nature. Sometimes we just do not want to face the truth, in the end we can't face the truth anymore. The sad fact is, there are people who rather die or lose themselves than to face it.

nvr watch this power show, wasted. but y would he guessed 'heads' for 30plus times? cos of the word HOPE. he HOPES that this time he guess wrong but next time he will guess right. without HOPE one will have to lan lan face the truth, but who will want to face any truth? without HOPE one will have to realisticly deal with his problems and his current situation. but who will want to do all these shit jobs? might as well turn and run away and HOPE for a better future easier right?

[colins]

nvr watch this power show, wasted. but y would he guessed 'heads' for 30plus times? cos of the word HOPE. he HOPES that this time he guess wrong but next time he will guess right. without HOPE one will have to lan lan face the truth, but who will want to face any truth? without HOPE one will have to realisticly deal with his problems and his current situation. but who will want to do all these shit jobs? might as well turn and run away and HOPE for a better future easier right?

Dude you got all the answers right. In the scene, the negotiator was almost suicidal after guessing all the wrong answer. The hope diminishes along every bad try until he can't take the truth anymore and want to jump down from the roof. To die rather than to face the fact that he can never win.

[HCKing]

Dude you got all the answers right. In the scene, the negotiator was almost suicidal after guessing all the wrong answer. The hope diminishes along every bad try until he can't take the truth anymore and want to jump down from the roof. To die rather than to face the fact that he can never win.

he can never win, so does Ekin. suppose the negotiator guess the right answer it will be Ekin's turn to HOPE. the girls involved in KC shits also have their own HOPES of winning over the guys and getting wat they want. tats y i think wat sammyboyfor said make some sense lah, one should be realistic when come to commercial sex.

[colins]

he can never win, so does Ekin. suppose the negotiator guess the right answer it will be Ekin's turn to HOPE. the girls involved in KC shits also have their own HOPES of winning over the guys and getting wat they want. tats y i think wat sammyboyfor said make some sense lah, one should be realistic when come to commercial sex.

You need to go watch it online or something. Quite a few movies use mindgames as the centre stage but 暗战 1 and 2 really emphasize on it.

To answer your question, the person setting up the stage for the opponent will know the rules and bottomline of the game. Therefore there is very little chance of the game master falling into the same trap which he has been using against his opponent. Applying this on the scene, Ekin knows he can control the outcome, therefore he plays it. He will never lose becos his opponent will never win. If there is 1% chance that he will lose, he will stop the game and start another one which he is confident of 100% control. Again he will never lose. This is not a defensive strategy, this is an offensive strategy. When a person is able to control the outcome he can get anything he wants in the world.

Money is a currency for normal people to get what they want. Mindgame players can persuade his target to give him what he wants, including their own lives.

Problem is, we think talking is cheap. Worse still, we think talking is just their way to get close to us and help to give us our relief.

[sammyboyfor]

Oh about that free time. Sam's right to a certain extent, living down under has a different pace & no much meimeis to lure him :D


No meimeis down under??? You gotta be kidding! They have flooded the major cities here just as they have the world over.:rolleyes:

[DO_YOU_BJ]

Now that is a class act all by itself. Not for us mere mortals to replicate. ;)

Thanks hor Slider for the under the belt punch.

Bro porscheclub, the above is not possible.
The above takes alot of patience and grooming....yes grooming...it can be achieved.
Lastly, for those who wish to apply the above, you need the following criteria to be met:
1) You must be in ABSOLUTE control of everything
2) You wife must belong to those who are thinkers, not the old fashioned types who just nag and bitch abt everything under the sun
3) Your mistress to be must have nerves of steel, brains and lots of it, patience and knows how to win the hearts of your wife n family n children if any

As for you, your job is to ensure there's a code of conduct to be met in your harem, know how and who to do wat and wif who........allocation of responsibilities will and must be based on hierachy
Last, once blended in, you leave them to sort everything out, you just be the king for your kingdom is well ruled by your new board of directors who will fuck themselves up shud they try to screw or undermine the kingdom!

Last n most important, tell your wife that in due respect of her position, NO ONE else can bear your children except her.
As for the mistresses, tell them that in due respect to your 1st wife, their curse for being wif you is to be never be allowed to bear children for you, but you'll love them more than your 1st wife...hehehehehe

Basic fundamentals only hor....many will be created along the way to suit and passify situations that will surely emerge from time to time.

[flowerpot]

Thanks hor Slider for the under the belt punch.

Bro porscheclub, the above is not possible.
The above takes alot of patience and grooming....yes grooming...it can be achieved.
Lastly, for those who wish to apply the above, you need the following criteria to be met:
1) You must be in ABSOLUTE control of everything
2) You wife must belong to those who are thinkers, not the old fashioned types who just nag and bitch abt everything under the sun
3) Your mistress to be must have nerves of steel, brains and lots of it, patience and knows how to win the hearts of your wife n family n children if any

As for you, your job is to ensure there's a code of conduct to be met in your harem, know how and who to do wat and wif who........allocation of responsibilities will and must be based on hierachy
Last, once blended in, you leave them to sort everything out, you just be the king for your kingdom is well ruled by your new board of directors who will fuck themselves up shud they try to screw or undermine the kingdom!

Last n most important, tell your wife that in due respect of her position, NO ONE else can bear your children except her.
As for the mistresses, tell them that in due respect to your 1st wife, their curse for being wif you is to be never be allowed to bear children for you, but you'll love them more than your 1st wife...hehehehehe

Basic fundamentals only hor....many will be created along the way to suit and passify situations that will surely emerge from time to time.



Than where should TS stay???

1st home or 2nd home???

I think its not possible.... cant be sometimes here and othertimes there.....

How can 1st wife accept?????

And in TS's case, 2nd wife also cannot accept.....

Is this a way out??? i dun think so....

Man have not emerge with a way out of this tricky situation yet...

[DO_YOU_BJ]

Than where should TS stay???
At home la

1st home or 2nd home???
No 1st or 2nd, his own home

I think its not possible.... cant be sometimes here and othertimes there.....
Of cos not, but can, if all under 1 roof

How can 1st wife accept?????
That' y i said GROOM

And in TS's case, 2nd wife also cannot accept.....
Also need to groom

Is this a way out??? i dun think so....
Everything in this mortal world has a way out! Just bcos u tink it cant be dun, does not mean it aint possible

Man have not emerge with a way out of this tricky situation yet...
HAHA I have....I have 3 staying under 1 roof wif me now! Read my siggy dude!;)

[DTCEPL]

HAHA I have....I have 3 staying under 1 roof wif me now! Read my siggy dude![/COLOR];)

Bro DYBJ....you're my idol:D Way to go!!!

[DO_YOU_BJ]

Bro DYBJ....you're my idol:D Way to go!!!

Pls pls never say that again....cos me shy shy;)

[HCKing]

You need to go watch it online or something. Quite a few movies use mindgames as the centre stage but 暗战 1 and 2 really emphasize on it.

To answer your question, the person setting up the stage for the opponent will know the rules and bottomline of the game. Therefore there is very little chance of the game master falling into the same trap which he has been using against his opponent. Applying this on the scene, Ekin knows he can control the outcome, therefore he plays it. He will never lose becos his opponent will never win. If there is 1% chance that he will lose, he will stop the game and start another one which he is confident of 100% control. Again he will never lose. This is not a defensive strategy, this is an offensive strategy. When a person is able to control the outcome he can get anything he wants in the world.

Money is a currency for normal people to get what they want. Mindgame players can persuade his target to give him what he wants, including their own lives.

Problem is, we think talking is cheap. Worse still, we think talking is just their way to get close to us and help to give us our relief.

tats true. the targets can be different but the same old coin can be used over and over again, until the day he meets one lao jiao who has seen it all to counter him. one needs alot of understanding of his ownself and his strength and weaknesses to play the game. problem with talking is we often have the habit of just believing watever others says, no matter hw BS they r. try telling an ugly charbo she is SYT i believe she will also blush.:p

[slider_72]

Bro DYBJ....you're my idol:D Way to go!!!

That is why I said he is a class act all by himself which us mere mortals cannot hope to replicate. Bro DYBJ, its not a below the belt punch. On the contrary, it is an expression of my sincere adolation and admiration. You the man. :D

[DO_YOU_BJ]

Bro DYBJ, its not a below the belt punch. On the contrary, it is an expression of my sincere adolation and admiration. You the man. :D

Tks my brudder, very paiseh though.....but tks tks;)

[porscheclub]

No meimeis down under??? You gotta be kidding! They have flooded the major cities here just as they have the world over.:rolleyes:

Boss, not that I would argue with you but I was quite surprised when I read that there are currently about 100,000 Chinese Nationals working/residing in Singapore which has a size of no more than 700sqkm.

I can't find the news but it was released recently by the Chinese Embassy commenting about the increased murders in SG involving PRCs.

They do adapt very well, I was in several parts of European cities & they're fluent with their languages.

[porscheclub]

Than where should TS stay???
At home la

1st home or 2nd home???
No 1st or 2nd, his own home

I think its not possible.... cant be sometimes here and othertimes there.....
Of cos not, but can, if all under 1 roof

How can 1st wife accept?????
That' y i said GROOM

And in TS's case, 2nd wife also cannot accept.....
Also need to groom

Is this a way out??? i dun think so....
Everything in this mortal world has a way out! Just bcos u tink it cant be dun, does not mean it aint possible

Man have not emerge with a way out of this tricky situation yet...
HAHA I have....I have 3 staying under 1 roof wif me now! Read my siggy dude!;)

U buggers make me laugh! Thanks for that.

Anyway, just a short update. I've made a little leeway by having the 2nd one easing off a little now. Reminds me of negotiating a contract. :mad: Phewww.... time for a break.

[DO_YOU_BJ]

Phewww.... time for a break.

Good...take this time to cool your mind and come up wif the ultimate PLAN!!!!

[colins]

U buggers make me laugh! Thanks for that.

Anyway, just a short update. I've made a little leeway by having the 2nd one easing off a little now. Reminds me of negotiating a contract. :mad: Phewww.... time for a break.

Alll of us have been negotiating since we know how to talk! hahahaha...:D

[DTCEPL]

Anyway, just a short update. I've made a little leeway by having the 2nd one easing off a little now. Reminds me of negotiating a contract. :mad: Phewww.... time for a break.

Bro Porscheclub.....you can consider to try negotiating with your two wifey about housing them under the same roof, just like Bro DYBJ:D. 'Crazy' idea it may seem but it works in Bro DYBJ's case. :rolleyes:

[aakumu]

Bro Porscheclub.....you can consider to try negotiating with your two wifey about housing them under the same roof, just like Bro DYBJ:D. 'Crazy' idea it may seem but it works in Bro DYBJ's case. :rolleyes:
Hi bro,
The Islam way can have 4 wifes if they all can get along, so maybe good for whoever can get the first wife approval.

My humble two cents.

[colins]

tats true. the targets can be different but the same old coin can be used over and over again, until the day he meets one lao jiao who has seen it all to counter him. one needs alot of understanding of his ownself and his strength and weaknesses to play the game. problem with talking is we often have the habit of just believing watever others says, no matter hw BS they r. try telling an ugly charbo she is SYT i believe she will also blush.:p

Ah...yes. Thats becos we always like to hear what we wanna hear. We always want people to say what we wanna hear too, thats why our pride makes us reliance on others. We become subjected to their whims and fancy. So when people want to confuse you, they tell you everything you want (pride), and you will give them everything they want (money). Fair trade to them. They dun kiam you anything afterwards.

[colins]

Hi bro,
The Islam way can have 4 wifes if they all can get along, so maybe good for whoever can get the first wife approval.

My humble two cents.

Bros, let's not talk about using religion as a means to get what we want. Seriously, its not really a club where you'll get some benefits after you joined them. Most of the muslims got one wife and they stay happily with their wife and family, if we can't, its not with our religion lo.

[HCKing]

Ah...yes. Thats becos we always like to hear what we wanna hear. We always want people to say what we wanna hear too, thats why our pride makes us reliance on others. We become subjected to their whims and fancy. So when people want to confuse you, they tell you everything you want (pride), and you will give them everything they want (money). Fair trade to them. They dun kiam you anything afterwards.

i rem i once purposely make fun of an ugly girl by saying she chio after she go change her hairstyle and guess wat? she believes!:eek: hw can an ugly person becomes chio just by changing her hairstyle? same thing hw can a person becomes lovable just becos gt alot of $ to spend? but inside us we always want ppl to say we r good lah chio lah hunk lah rich lah and all the good things to make our ego feel good. frm wat i see those who tio kc until jialat deep inside them they r actually looking forward to be kced. it always take 2 hands to clap.

[colins]

.... frm wat i see those who tio kc until jialat deep inside them they r actually looking forward to be kced. it always take 2 hands to clap.

Exactly. This is the true sadness to all KC stories. So damn true that its scary to see how vulnerable we are.

[HCKing]

Exactly. This is the true sadness to all KC stories. So damn true that its scary to see how vulnerable we are.

after reading some of the stories here, can understand hw u feel just like when u see a poor chap falls into a drain but u cant pull him out even though u tried yr best to help. bo pian when comes to commercial sex the same old saying is never wrong: ' when gt demand will have supply':D

[slider_72]

after reading some of the stories here, can understand hw u feel just like when u see a poor chap falls into a drain but u cant pull him out even though u tried yr best to help. bo pian when comes to commercial sex the same old saying is never wrong: ' when gt demand will have supply':D

Not true bro. This is like the drug trade. When there is supply, there will be demand. The Keynesian theory does not apply for this industry.

[HCKing]

Not true bro. This is like the drug trade. When there is supply, there will be demand. The Keynesian theory does not apply for this industry.

think u misunderstood wat i said liao. wat i meant was when there is demand for KC there will be supply. demand for KC is natural but one should be looking for it at the right place. places like KTV, HC and GL etc. are no no.

[colins]

Guys, the need to be KCed doesn't reserve itself exclusively to the flesh trade. The industry is merely a catalyst where money can be an accelerator. Bro HCKing when you gave the example of an ugly girl wanting compliments on her new hairdo, this example can be applied on your own friends as well. People who openly display the 'need' to be KCed get his demand from everywhere, mostly at places where money is only indirectly concerned. For all you know, 90% of his friends are all like that and they would feed each other on every kopi session or dinner outings.

Its with the person himself. Wherever he goes, he get KCed. If he starts to look around him with opened eyes one day, he'll notice that people around him 'pamper' him that way, for their selfish gain or not depends on their intention, but still the person is very open to attack. All he need is to meet a girl with intention on his possessions.

[wolfgang999]

We might not love the person we marry, or might never get to marry the person we love.

such is the sad truth of life.. we just have to see through the decision made and be responsbile for it.

[slider_72]

think u misunderstood wat i said liao. wat i meant was when there is demand for KC there will be supply. demand for KC is natural but one should be looking for it at the right place. places like KTV, HC and GL etc. are no no.

Not exactly. My theory is as follow;

A guy may not be looking for KC (ie no demand) but the WL may come on to him (ie supply is present). The WL creates the 希望, and in these circumstances most guys would succumb and go for it (ie supply creates the demand).

I would agree if there is a need for love and affection from a member of the opposite sex, the guy should not be looking for it amongst the pratitioner of the flesh trade. That is asking for trouble. Most times the bros who get involved in KC problems with members of this profession are mired in it not because they are looking for it but because the girls made themselves available. The high hand ones would play cock teaser first but give a sufficient dosage of 希望 in order to ensnare the guy.

With every rule, there is an exception to the rule. The exception would be those who intentionally go looking for for KC with the WLs probably because they are facing some emotional crisis like a failed relationship and thus on the rebound.

And unlike the usual economics theory of price being determined by the confluence of supply and demand, in this case, the demand is more like a bell curve. Low demand at the start and increasing demand as the girl ply him with more supply of KC. The eventual price would be determined by the apex of the bell curve when the guy is totally screwed. After that, he realises his folly and the demand starts to diminish regardless of the availability of supply.

Once demand starts to diminish, the supply will simply shift to another emerging market.

So I am glad the BOSS created this section. Over here, we have a free exchange of information. We get to hear of how others got into shit and the advice from the Honourable Members of the Jedi Council.

With better market information, hopefully the bros here would be able to use these information to hedge their risks. We start to see how this market operates. Over time, perhaps the seasoned ones will be able to tell whether to long on a particular WL and to short another WL. The more experienced ones will also start having a portfolio of investments and instead of being KCed, the senior investors will do the KCing. The KCing can even be done on a team level against a group of girls. For want of a better analogy, I would describe this as similar to IRS (interest rate swaps).

Unfortunately most bros are like the old uncles who bought into the Minibonds without knowing what are structured investments all about, who have never even heard of the term collateral debt obligations. These are the people who will get burnt.

The seasoned bros who see the whole picture are like the institutional investors. No amount of supply can influence their demand. The seasoned bros would be able to calculate the arbitrage and go in for the kill as and when a suitable opportunity arise.

Therefore I think it will be inevitable that there will be more and more bros getting KCed and getting burnt in the process because that is how this market is structured.

[HCKing]

Guys, the need to be KCed doesn't reserve itself exclusively to the flesh trade. The industry is merely a catalyst where money can be an accelerator. Bro HCKing when you gave the example of an ugly girl wanting compliments on her new hairdo, this example can be applied on your own friends as well. People who openly display the 'need' to be KCed get his demand from everywhere, mostly at places where money is only indirectly concerned. For all you know, 90% of his friends are all like that and they would feed each other on every kopi session or dinner outings.

Its with the person himself. Wherever he goes, he get KCed. If he starts to look around him with opened eyes one day, he'll notice that people around him 'pamper' him that way, for their selfish gain or not depends on their intention, but still the person is very open to attack. All he need is to meet a girl with intention on his possessions.

yup the supply can come frm anywhere anytime. the ugly girl can be KCed by any bastards who recognise her weakness. i have also seen and heard guys willing to be cai tao for their steadies anytime. hmmm issit becoming a norm nwadays liao? no cai tao = no girl? :p

[HCKing]

Not exactly. My theory is as follow;

A guy may not be looking for KC (ie no demand) but the WL may come on to him (ie supply is present). The WL creates the 希望, and in these circumstances most guys would succumb and go for it (ie supply creates the demand).

I would agree if there is a need for love and affection from a member of the opposite sex, the guy should not be looking for it amongst the pratitioner of the flesh trade. That is asking for trouble. Most times the bros who get involved in KC problems with members of this profession are mired in it not because they are looking for it but because the girls made themselves available. The high hand ones would play cock teaser first but give a sufficient dosage of 希望 in order to ensnare the guy.

With every rule, there is an exception to the rule. The exception would be those who intentionally go looking for for KC with the WLs probably because they are facing some emotional crisis like a failed relationship and thus on the rebound.

And unlike the usual economics theory of price being determined by the confluence of supply and demand, in this case, the demand is more like a bell curve. Low demand at the start and increasing demand as the girl ply him with more supply of KC. The eventual price would be determined by the apex of the bell curve when the guy is totally screwed. After that, he realises his folly and the demand starts to diminish regardless of the availability of supply.

Once demand starts to diminish, the supply will simply shift to another emerging market.

So I am glad the BOSS created this section. Over here, we have a free exchange of information. We get to hear of how others got into shit and the advice from the Honourable Members of the Jedi Council.

With better market information, hopefully the bros here would be able to use these information to hedge their risks. We start to see how this market operates. Over time, perhaps the seasoned ones will be able to tell whether to long on a particular WL and to short another WL. The more experienced ones will also start having a portfolio of investments and instead of being KCed, the senior investors will do the KCing. The KCing can even be done on a team level against a group of girls. For want of a better analogy, I would describe this as similar to IRS (interest rate swaps).

Unfortunately most bros are like the old uncles who bought into the Minibonds without knowing what are structured investments all about, who have never even heard of the term collateral debt obligations. These are the people who will get burnt.

The seasoned bros who see the whole picture are like the institutional investors. No amount of supply can influence their demand. The seasoned bros would be able to calculate the arbitrage and go in for the kill as and when a suitable opportunity arise.

Therefore I think it will be inevitable that there will be more and more bros getting KCed and getting burnt in the process because that is how this market is structured.

SIBEH CHIM MAN!!! 甘拜下风 :D

[Zen Sex]

Bro Slider_72, do agreed with you in some points however investment might not be suitable as an example here. Apparently there is no ROI but giving and giving to the undetermine dark hole that can never be filled.

Anything related to relationship is something that once will give without an expection of any return. Likewise for any decision made, the outcome is face the reality.

[colins]

Not exactly. My theory is as follow;

A guy may not be looking for KC (ie no demand) but the WL may come on to him (ie supply is present). The WL creates the 希望, and in these circumstances most guys would succumb and go for it (ie supply creates the demand).

I would agree if there is a need for love and affection from a member of the opposite sex, the guy should not be looking for it amongst the pratitioner of the flesh trade. That is asking for trouble. Most times the bros who get involved in KC problems with members of this profession are mired in it not because they are looking for it but because the girls made themselves available. The high hand ones would play cock teaser first but give a sufficient dosage of 希望 in order to ensnare the guy.

With every rule, there is an exception to the rule. The exception would be those who intentionally go looking for for KC with the WLs probably because they are facing some emotional crisis like a failed relationship and thus on the rebound.


Wah bro, a lot of technical terms. hahaha.... can only answer to the first part.

When a WL create a hope (希望), she has to read you like a book first. She needs to know what you lack what you want in life that you can't get, then hint to you that what you can get is with her. She then show you her strong points accordingly and tailor make herself to your 'demand', but never give it to you. That is why every girl appears differently to every man, and only the super highhand can appear the same (cos she consistently go after one type of men, successful ones).

In that, I will say demand comes first. Demand that even oneself doesn't know. That's why I said your girl had already KCed you on the way back to her place. She knows something about you that perhaps you dun even know. And she has already tailored herself to your needs. The rest is up to you now, but remember she will always remain the girl in the world who somehow suits you. That, my friend, is a very very strong attraction.

[cablesnwires]

....

Apparently there is no ROI but giving and giving to the undetermine dark hole that can never be filled.

Not really true, there is ROI, but in different form, and likely it is intangible. Typical example would be that he felt needed and that someone show concern for him (of course, this is superficial at most, but he doesn't want to know since he is already mired in the KC).

Anything related to relationship is something that once will give without an expection of any return. Likewise for any decision made, the outcome is face the reality.

Agreed with this, but how many of us really don't expect anything in return? ;)

[HCKing]

Bro Slider_72, do agreed with you in some points however investment might not be suitable as an example here. Apparently there is no ROI but giving and giving to the undetermine dark hole that can never be filled.

Anything related to relationship is something that once will give without an expection of any return. Likewise for any decision made, the outcome is face the reality.

yr nick gt class man. hehehe. wat u and slider_72 said have their truth cos not all man react the same when KCed, depend on their personalities. some adventurous ones r willing to do many crazy things for the girl just to make her happy. some calculative ones will think of returns 1st then give. maybe u belongs to the adventurous type.:D

[slider_72]

Bro Slider_72, do agreed with you in some points however investment might not be suitable as an example here. Apparently there is no ROI but giving and giving to the undetermine dark hole that can never be filled.


Ahhhh... That is applicable for the newbies who don't know the rules of the game. They give thinking that there will be a ROI. There might be some intangible ROI in the form of getting the desired attention during that period of time but more often than not the investments would be wasted.

For the seasoned cheongsters who know the rules of the game, there would be calculated giving with a clear objective in mind. I am not a seasoned cheongster but I have witnessed how it is done. There is a ROI on the investment made.

Whether it is a dark hole or not, if you are in control, why worry? Using another analogy, if you are an oil company drilling for oil, you will have your geophysists and petroleum engineers conduct seismic surveys, well-logging data, etc before deciding where to drill a new well. After the well is drilled, you would place the Christmas tree over the wellhead to control the pressure.

Its all about knowledge and control, bro.


In that, I will say demand comes first. Demand that even oneself doesn't know. That's why I said your girl had already KCed you on the way back to her place. She knows something about you that perhaps you dun even know. And she has already tailored herself to your needs. The rest is up to you now, but remember she will always remain the girl in the world who somehow suits you. That, my friend, is a very very strong attraction.

Indeed a Honourable Member of the all-seeing and all-knowing Jedi Council. I frankly did not see how she started her KC on the way back that night. All I remembered was that I was starting to get a hangover and was desperate to get home and hit the sack.

I still have lots to learn.

[DTCEPL]

Using another analogy, if you are an oil company drilling for oil, you will have your geophysists and petroleum engineers conduct seismic surveys, well-logging data, etc before deciding where to drill a new well. After the well is drilled, you would place the Christmas tree over the wellhead to control the pressure.



Bro Slider_72, u beri steady ley, yesterday is lawyer, today become driller:D

[colins]

Indeed a Honourable Member of the all-seeing and all-knowing Jedi Council. I frankly did not see how she started her KC on the way back that night. All I remembered was that I was starting to get a hangover and was desperate to get home and hit the sack.

I still have lots to learn.

Cannot say this, I'm more for you-watch-my-back-I-watch-yours. Though I can't say this to jojogigi cos he watches arse. hahaha...juz kidding. :p

[DTCEPL]

I frankly did not see how she started her KC on the way back that night. All I remembered was that I was starting to get a hangover and was desperate to get home and hit the sack.

I still have lots to learn.

Still talking about the China Doll huh!!!:D

Seems like she did got your attention somehow.

[slider_72]

Still talking about the China Doll huh!!!

Seems like she did got your attention somehow.

Au contraire, mon ami. It is not Dalian Dolly that we are talking about here. :D It is she, comme une fleur, son nom est lis.

Translation : like a flower, her name is [insert name:D] No good to post her name so openly lah.

Merci beaucoup.

[slider_72]

Bro Slider_72, u beri steady ley, yesterday is lawyer, today become driller:D

No lah. I am still an Ah Beng.

[DTCEPL]

Au contraire, mon ami. It is not Dalian Dolly that we are talking about here. :D It is she, comme une fleur, son nom est lis.

Translation : like a flower, her name is [insert name:D] No good to post her name so openly lah.

Merci beaucoup.

:rolleyes:I catch no Balls.........I can only blame myself for not studying hard enough when I am young....din take up third language, only know how to play marbles:o

[slider_72]

:rolleyes:I catch no Balls.........I can only blame myself for not studying hard enough when I am young....din take up third language, only know how to play marbles:o

Well, the ladies have always complimented me on being a cunning linguist. The way to a woman's heart is how a man works the gifts of the tongue.

:cool:

[DTCEPL]

Well, the ladies have always complimented me on being a cunning linguist. The way to a woman's heart is how a man works the gifts of the tongue.



Pattern Liao Liao:rolleyes:

Why are u still here posting, I tot you guys are activated to HFJ tonite!!!

[slider_72]

Pattern Liao Liao:rolleyes:

Why are u still here posting, I tot you guys are activated to HFJ tonite!!!

Tell you already I am an Ah Beng but you don't believe so lim pei bo pian must chu pattern and pretend to be damn clever like scholar lor. :D

Tonight stand down lei. You cannot make it tio bo? Your fault we also kanna stand down lah. Next time go kopi you buy.

[EtherC]

You mean like oral sex? =p

Well, the ladies have always complimented me on being a cunning linguist. The way to a woman's heart is how a man works the gifts of the tongue.

:cool:

[slider_72]

You mean like oral sex? =p

:cool: :D

I don't know why they always get so excited whenever I lick my eyebrows.

[colins]

:cool: :D

I don't know why they always get so excited whenever I lick my eyebrows.

Like that you dun need to hang flowers liao. Just stand in front of the stage and do your stunt. I think they will just fling themselves at you. :D

[jojogigi]

Cannot say this, I'm more for you-watch-my-back-I-watch-yours. Though I can't say this to jojogigi cos he watches arse. hahaha...juz kidding. :p

i only watch do you bj's and no 68's arse... hohoho

[DTCEPL]

Tonight stand down lei. You cannot make it tio bo? Your fault we also kanna stand down lah. Next time go kopi you buy.

Lim Kopi eat prata I buy no prob lah, if Lim Beer at cheapo KTV also can, but hor Qiu Jiu at HFJ....that type Xiao Ti can't help liao, bcos me also Ah Seng bo study.....work like hell also earn peanuts onli....you Bros patronise kind of Joints, one nite spending like my one years no eat no spend income like tat:o.

Hiaz....HFJ, I can only smell but cant see no touch lah, touch liao I sell my virgin Kar Chng also not enough.

[DO_YOU_BJ]

Lim Kopi eat prata I buy no prob lah, if Lim Beer at cheapo KTV also can, but hor Qiu Jiu at HFJ....that type Xiao Ti can't help liao, bcos me also Ah Seng bo study.....work like hell also earn peanuts onli....you Bros patronise kind of Joints, one nite spending like my one years no eat no spend income like tat:o.

Hiaz....HFJ, I can only smell but cant see no touch lah, touch liao I sell my virgin Kar Chng also not enough.

Remember wat u say, there's a kopi session tonight, so you got more than 12hours to prepare liaozzzzzzzzz
C U then.

[Zen Sex]

Not really true, there is ROI, but in different form, and likely it is intangible.

If the person think it is an investment and expect ROI, then the preception is totally wrong. Human is not product, if it does then the relationship is fake and the so call ROI is also fake.

[Zen Sex]

Its all about knowledge and control, bro.

Yupe however when the feeling come, it blind their preception and no seeing the reality. That is human and especially man with full of LOVE.

[tokkon1]

It's all hunky dory now but once you've lived with her for a few years, you'll find they're all the same. :rolleyes:

Hi boss,

Your one liner, its so funny. It always makes me laugh.

Seems like nothing's sacred to you.:D

[angelinekoh16]

hi porscheclub,

it have been very long since you last post a reply on this thread..i readed your story.. can`t help thinking that you might be my husband.. but some story of your seem not quite same with my husband.. but our story is about the same.

so who have you choosed? your wife or your gf? do you mind sharing?

[ju3t4fun]

Hi Porscheclud

I am in the same boat and it is actually difficult to make a decision. Whatever decision, one of them will be hurt. Also, going back to your wife may not be the same again, can she forgive and forget?

[angelinekoh16]

hi ju3t4fun,

ya it is hard to forgive and forget.. but with lot of love give to your wife.. she will forgive and forget for the sake of the child. if u have one. also u need to tell ur wife what u don`t like about her.. i believe if she love u and the child, she will change for the better.

i am reading this fourm to learn.. to learn how to have a better sex life and also hope to win him back. i hope he could give me a chance.

[shanshen]

Bro TS

have u ever consider to check the ba zhi to find out if both of you are compatible..( refer to u and yr gf, or u and yr wife ).

i have attended coure on this; if your dob and your gf dob (must be the "english version" as in china, different province uses different method, some use the "lunar date") has sets of 2&7 or 7&2


1 set of 2&7 or 7&2 - both of u are compatible
2 sets - third parties (can in inlaws or gf) interfering and may leads
to problem in relationships
3 sets - strong compatibility and third parties not able to rock it
4 sets - its a marriage made in heaven
5 sets - diasaters in the relationship...
no sets of it - not compatibe, just attraction which which the love will not last long..

also if the ladies has 2&7 or 7&2 with a 9 as its root number, this lady has very high chance to be someone mistress or living a life like a mistress...(meaning enjoying life to without having to work)

I am not a fortune teller but this couse i attended, helps me to understand myself better...

[ju3t4fun]

Hi Angeline

I don't how to tell her, each time I brought up the issue, she will said that I think very negative of her. Anyway it long story.

I think it is not just sex that you can win him back. The different between a PRC and a SGP gal is the the former still believe man is superior than woman and don't mind to be the little woman(小女人，whereby the SGP gal want equality. It not wrong to demand for equality (my six cents) but man is still man, they still want to be in commanding position.

[ING ING]

Well, bros. My time has come. Not too sure if this is a poll, a story or asking for comments. For months, I suffered & tormented for I fell in love with another women. She's all that any men would ever wanted. She's a dozen years younger, talented, good cook, takes care of me tenderly like a nurse, has a kind heart & loves kids. She is beautiful, a gem among the field & an attraction in parties. Most importantly, she loves me dearly. Sex is unbelievable but I've reached a point where it's not the must have and lived without it for more than a year.

Bro, my advice would be make a decision after you SERIOUSLY thought thru. You dun want to live your life with regrets later.:cool:

[ING ING]

I will choose the family and children, a Man regardless, must take up the responsibilities which he have started, and even if he carrys with 遗憾 / regrets to his grave.....so be it.

In today world, you can have another new family with the kids. I have a friend who I see his marriage(10 yrs) should last long. But then his wife and him divorce in the shortest time. Guess the feeling has gone and his wife do not want to continue the lifestyle for whole life.:rolleyes:

[ToxicHex]

Quote "She's a dozen years younger, talented, good cook, takes care of me tenderly like a nurse, has a kind heart & loves kids. She is beautiful, a gem among the field & an attraction in parties. Most importantly, she loves me dearly. Sex is unbelievable"

Bro, sorry to be straight, but when i look at this, it seems superficial..bcos of how she carries herself it excites you. Just a few kind words:

1) She hot, well she's young too. Little girls are like lollipops always the sweetest...but why do u feel this way?

Ans: U've been in the marriage too long, e romance has sizzled. U noe that n u wan smthing more...the fun u had w gfs, the young days of excitement. She makes u feel like the man...(Of cos la, cos we are more matured, more financially capable & as a gf we dun have to commit like we haf to in marriage). So now you feel like u have wings.

But think, ur wife who stood by u through times when u didn;t haf a good life. Is she that bad? Try to recall the good old days...cos u will only feel it when u leave the marriage. Now, ur view wil be clouded for sure.

One day, when ur romance with this young girl dies out...u will think abt ur wife. Questions like "Y i couldn be more discipline", "y i let my kids down", all the what ifs, maybes would surface. Think of the days when u dated ur wife, when she watched u when u were sick, hw she brought up the kids. If she is f up all the while...den choose the new girl. If she does everything for u, for the family..think twice & wisely. Dun be biased when thinking.

We man are easily swayed...always distracted and give our selves all the defensive reasons as if we know how to love. But do we? Here we are at SBF lookin for fun...to perk our lives...discreet fine. But to ruin not just ur life but ur kid's, ur wife's and also ur young gf's.....

What's love? A lifetime of commitment thru thick n thin, the wedding vows...i cudn do it. But many a times we look back...is the grass really greener? Do we wan greener pastures? if this is wat we wan...then y settle now in the first place?

There is no right or wrong. Most importantly, WE as man must always be happy. We like to be THE MAN. But solve this issue well...minimise the pain. I hope ur decision will be a gd one...

Godspeed buddy.

[Megatronzombie]

hi porscheclub,

it have been very long since you last post a reply on this thread..i readed your story.. can`t help thinking that you might be my husband.. but some story of your seem not quite same with my husband.. but our story is about the same.

so who have you choosed? your wife or your gf? do you mind sharing?

Godspeed, Angeline. Hope you managed to save your marriage. There's too many divorces going on right now..

....

by the way...

its 'read' not 'readed' :D