Lovely article.. Different writers have different perspectives..... Im not supporting any point of view..... But no harm in knowing different view points
I hv highlighted some parts in red..... Btw bros being management trained, i am a firm believer in MASLOWS MODEL.
Makes for good reading
Filipina, Love and Trust – How Do I Know My Girl Really Cares For Me?
http://www.soyummykaya.com/2011/07/2...filipina-girl/
First off, I want to give a big thanks to Mofu69 for his post Searching For A Way Out – Bargirl Style. That post plus the following comments (especially from Yumi). It opened my mind up and let me write out some thoughts that I’ve always had stored away on this subject matter.
That one girl was getting 4,000 pesos a day!? Wow…what a nice sponsor! On to my post…this is a long one, so sit down, unbuckle your pants, take your dick out (or flop your vaginas on the table), put on some light classical music and get your reading glasses on. And here we go…
I’m sure some of the guys that come across this site are supporting a girl. Question is, do you think the girl is being serious with him? Do the girls think the guys are being serious with them?
And even if you marry a girl after initially supporting her, does that mean she truly loves you or does she just love your money? If you’re working in the bar, you’ve made a decision that you have no other option for money and you are willing to sell your body for some quick cash. Also, you know in the back of your mind that you could land the jackpot and get much more cash if you find someone to take you out of the bar and support you.
Could the girl actually fall in love with the guy? Sure, it could happen. Does it and will it happen? Most likely no. After spending enough time in the Philippines, in the bars and meeting girls, I’ve seen what usually takes place.
First, the girl works in the bar. Usually she hates this work because she may need to have sex with a new customer every night. She can’t leave the job, though, because she needs the money. So she stays, and gets as much money as she can while she can handle the stress of the job. This means pissing you guys off by constant pestering of ladies drinks/barfines and other means to get some cash. Next thing she knows, there’s a guy that’s willing to steady barfine her (remove her from the bar permanently) and support her on a monthly basis. Is she going to say no? Hell no.
She’s going to say “I love you, too.”
Now, if the guy truly loves the girl, I do feel bad for him. Because for the guy, sure he genuinely may like the girl, and his feelings/emotions started in a normal pattern of seeing her, meeting her, and spending time with her. But for the girl, she’s not putting her feelings and emotions first.
She’s putting her necessity for survival first: get money. So of course she goes with the customer that night. She gets the barfine money. Then she’s being offered to be supported from the guy…30,000 a month for example. Regardless of if she likes the guy or not, she’s thinking to herself…”Hmmm…sex with multiple customers per week and pray that I can make 15,000 pesos per month…or just leave the bar altogether and tell this guy I love him and get 30,000 via Western Union.” Now tell me what your choice would be?
So this guy basically has no idea if the girl actually likes him, because she’s in such a bad position to start with. She hates her job as a bar girl and now someone is offering for her to quit her job AND get 30,000 pesos per month. The guy isn’t thinking about this.
He’s just thinking that he met a sexy girl that seems to enjoy spending time with him and tells him she loves him. She’s going to treat it like it’s a job. She’s going to show up on time to that internet cafe to talk to him – she’s going to answer his phone calls the second he rings her and she’s going to be as sweet as possible. Why? Because
she knows that one screw up will land her right back to square one in the bar.
So now the guy has this girl that obviously seems to love him because she’s oh so quick to reply to text messages, emails, and phone calls. After all, in any normal relationship those are important aspects. But, we need to remember, this is not a normal relationship. So what’s next?
Well, next is this: The guy goes back to his country to continue working and the love of his life quits her job and stays at home all day with the netbook he bought for her. Now the biggest problem in her life (money) is solved. She’s sitting there. She has food on the table. She has electricity (or as they say “current”) in the house, and she has no worries about her bills. Her family is happy because she’s sending them money from her “job as an SM employee.” She stays online daily to chat with her “boyfriend” when he’s available, and she always does her best to make her “boyfriend” happy.
So what’s the problem? Well, nothing if the guy doesn’t expect anything serious in the future with her. But if you do expect something serious in the future, you’re in for a world of surprise. She has support, but what is she missing? Now that the stress of money is gone, what’s next?
Maslow’s hierarchy of needs starts to kick in. Please click here to view the diagram (it will open in another window).
So we start off at the bottom of the pyramid, which is the most important to a human. Physiological and safety. So let’s ask, why are the girls working in the bars? Well, they need money. Why do they need money? Bottom of the pyramid: food. Next up on the pyramid is family and health. These are the ONLY reasons I’ve been given as to why a girl is working in a bar. “I need food for my baby. I need to support my family, etc.” Food for their baby, family, rent, etc. Right there though (in the pyramid) is also morality. This is why it’s so tough for the girl to make the decision to work in the bar and sell her body. Food is straight at the bottom as most important, but next up on the pyramid is the health and family. For food, if you’re starving, you will sell your body. Hell, I would. But then comes family/health. How important is that to the girl compared to morality? In the Philippines, family is extremely important to most, so the morality gets pushed to the side a little bit in the decision to work in the bar (or on the street, or whatever form of prostitution there is).
Now that we understand why they have made the decision to work in the bar, what happens if they all the sudden don’t need to? All the sudden shit gets flipped around and the girl’s most important needs are taken care of. Now she has a guy supporting her financially, providing food, housing, and support for her family. So what’s next? Let’s move on up the list.
Next up is “Love/belonging.” This, my friends, is where the problem presents itself. Now that you’re favorite sexy girl has her most important needs taken care of thanks to you, what is she going to do? She’s going to subconsciously move on up that pyramid.
She already knew when she met you that you’re not the guy she dreamed of. First off, you’re in a bar where guys go to take girls out every night for money. Why would any girl want a guy that goes to a bar? They don’t. Secondly, maybe you’re twice or even three times her age. How could her dreams of a normal family with kids ever come true when you’re already older than her grandfather?