Hi Bros,
I just found this forum recently and find it very useful understanding vietnamese spouse better.
Currently, i am caught in between my wife and my family. My wife is in a very bad and hostile relationship withmy sister. we're currently living with my parents and siblings under one roof.
Background
Met my wife in 2011 in J1, fell in love and got married, threw party in Vietnam June 2012. Held ceremony in SG in Feb. Got a kid 3 months old now. We are very happy together!
But the thing is...... my baxa relationship with my sister used to be ok but after my kid was born things just turned sour 2 weeks ago when my sister asked me why my baxa is giving her cold shoulders and whenever she sees my sister back, she would bring the baby back into the room.
I asked my baxa about it and she said its because my sister talks loudly at home, on shows on computer, talk on phone loud affecting the baby's sleep. The next thing i know she confronted my sister about it and they even had a big quarrel about it! im just torned between them. My baxa cried and start banging her head against the cupboard... ouch
During this 2 weeks, my sister was just cold and nonchalent complaining how my baxa acts differently behind my back. My sister promised me to watch her shows and talk on phone in her room, ever since then shes been hiding in the room most of the time.Last saturday night, my sister was watching her shows on the computer in the living room. My baxa was trying to put the baby to sleep in the living room, suddenly, she carried the baby and brought him into the room, she started crying and said - my sister is bullying her, my sister will get karma for whatever shes doing to her and the baby.
I have been consoling and coaxing my baxa. With each telling me their story, i am really confused and at my wits end to please both ends. I am sorry to type such a long post, but i really need advise and help to this issue as one is my baxa, another is my sister.
Would appreciate advise to resolve this issue. I cant move out now as i am currently paying off loans from the bank which i borrowed from the bank for the wedding in vietnam and dowry $10k to baxa mom. So, i am making month end but through this issue, my baxa ask me a couple of times when are we getting a house but stop after i told her when i paid off my loans, she understand
i really cant afford even 5 years down the road at the moment, and currently i am in transition for a new job.
Just really down on luck.........