Should I be single? or just take what comes along?

[PoundIt]

Been asking myself this question quite recently.

Currently 30 year old male, having to travel frequently due to my workload has already affected my personal life in many ways. Had a couple of flings on and off, enjoy chionging for the FLs once I have the time.

But seeing everyone around me are settling down, is making me thinking twice...
Personally, I'm enjoying the freedom I have at hand, then again, getting older without a companion once I get back to SG is kind of depressing.

It's been weeks and I'm still stuck with this question... should I just be single or just take whatever bullshit relationship I can get my hands on?

Even if I manage to settle down, chionging for FL might feel a bit different with all the guilt that might rain down on me one day... or will I even get to feel guilty at all?

what are your views, fellow chiongsters?

[homeboy2010]

Originally Posted by PoundIt

Been asking myself this question quite recently.

Currently 30 year old male, having to travel frequently due to my workload has already affected my personal life in many ways. Had a couple of flings on and off, enjoy chionging for the FLs once I have the time.

single male need to cheong to maintain sexual health. if you go GL legal joints, you can see many Jap cheong with no guilt as I heard from OKTs that Jap see sex as a healthy release for men.

But seeing everyone around me are settling down, is making me thinking twice...
Personally, I'm enjoying the freedom I have at hand, then again, getting older without a companion once I get back to SG is kind of depressing.

single is freedom. when you are married, family comes first.
next is financial stability.

It's been weeks and I'm still stuck with this question... should I just be single or just take whatever bullshit relationship I can get my hands on?

no rush unless you meet someone

Even if I manage to settle down, chionging for FL might feel a bit different with all the guilt that might rain down on me one day... or will I even get to feel guilty at all?
what are your views, fellow chiongsters?

cheong but dun bring the FL home.

[homeboy2010]

Originally Posted by PoundIt

Been asking myself this question quite recently.

Currently 30 year old male, having to travel frequently due to my workload has already affected my personal life in many ways. Had a couple of flings on and off, enjoy chionging for the FLs once I have the time.

single male need to cheong to maintain sexual health. if you go GL legal joints, you can see many Jap cheong with no guilt as I heard from OKTs that Jap see sex as a healthy release for men.

But seeing everyone around me are settling down, is making me thinking twice...
Personally, I'm enjoying the freedom I have at hand, then again, getting older without a companion once I get back to SG is kind of depressing.

single is freedom. when you are married, family comes first.
next is financial stability.

It's been weeks and I'm still stuck with this question... should I just be single or just take whatever bullshit relationship I can get my hands on?

no rush unless you meet someone

Even if I manage to settle down, chionging for FL might feel a bit different with all the guilt that might rain down on me one day... or will I even get to feel guilty at all?

what are your views, fellow chiongsters?

cheong but dun bring the FL home.

[orneryjoe]

If I have the chance to live my life over again, I would probably want to remain single.

That way, you can cheong freely and enjoy as much variety as you want.

Once married, no matter how attractive the wifey is, after some time, one would tend to be tired about tasting the same dish all the time.

One could still cheong on the side, but need to take all sorts of precautions. Opportunities are also much constrained and limited to certain times when wifey is not around or when one is not expected to be home.

Children comes with marriage mostly, but there is no guarantee that they will bring joy to one's life.

Too late for me, but you could still remain free and easy.

[Mr_don_juan]

After a period of singlehood, Being a married man, settle down, having kids and raising them up to be great people is a major goal in life, beside personal success and helping out society in some way. When you get older, there is no one to take care of, love you. When friends die out and it starts getting hard to take care of yourself, you need kids (grandkids even) there to support you. Also To further your gene and having children in a functional caring family unit. You become a mentor to your kids, as they grow up they end up teaching you forever.

[homeboy2010]

sorry for double post

[PoundIt]

hmmm... honestly, i have no idea what to do.
as a friend i can be nice and all... but the moment a relationship starts, it just triggers me to let the girl know more about me, being bad tempered and shit. always ended up hurting the girl and split up instead of getting the girl to understand me and my temper.
been enjoying the freedom ever since.
then again, like Mr don juan said, kids to take care of you and support you... etc... that's my concern... without having to hurt anyone that is

[samsam33]

These days, we cannot expect our childen (let alone, grandchildren) to take care of us when we're old

Being old folks, best is to be self-dependent and have own savings. If not, there is risk of being starved in the street

Originally Posted by Mr_don_juan

After a period of singlehood, Being a married man, settle down, having kids and raising them up to be great people is a major goal in life, beside personal success and helping out society in some way. When you get older, there is no one to take care of, love you. When friends die out and it starts getting hard to take care of yourself, you need kids (grandkids even) there to support you. Also To further your gene and having children in a functional caring family unit. You become a mentor to your kids, as they grow up they end up teaching you forever.

[Mr_don_juan]

Originally Posted by PoundIt

hmmm... honestly, i have no idea what to do.
as a friend i can be nice and all... but the moment a relationship starts, it just triggers me to let the girl know more about me, being bad tempered and shit. always ended up hurting the girl and split up instead of getting the girl to understand me and my temper.
been enjoying the freedom ever since.
then again, like Mr don juan said, kids to take care of you and support you... etc... that's my concern... without having to hurt anyone that is

I am also divided. On one hand I want children and a life partner. On the other hand I want no children and multiple partners. To find a life partner is also not that easy, unless are compatible physically, mentally, spiritually with your SO. There is no hard and fast rule, just listen with your own heart and brain. Just set a plan how long you want to enjoy your freedom, continue date, have one night stands, play as much as you can. If you get a quality girl, remember she has a biological clock that is ticking.. by then you should make your decision quick. To me, marriage is just a social, civil and religious contract, mainly intended for the upbringing of legitimate children (which i really want only), is not a fairy tale lit with pantomime of endless 'romance' like "happily married ever after" bullshit.

[PoundIt]

that i can't but to agree... i don't know... relationship and marriage are just a roller coaster ride... i don't believe that there's no conflicts in a r/s... then again.... finding a right partner is all i can wait for while enjoying my freedom...
i'm just lost and confused even thou i understand what you're telling

[Mr_don_juan]

Originally Posted by PoundIt

that i can't but to agree... i don't know... relationship and marriage are just a roller coaster ride... i don't believe that there's no conflicts in a r/s... then again.... finding a right partner is all i can wait for while enjoying my freedom...
i'm just lost and confused even thou i understand what you're telling

Don't be confused bro. Make more opportunites to earn more money, go travelling, open your own business, date your FLs/non-FLs and chiong wisely, visit nightclubs, read, play, go back to school to learn investment/savings. There are lots of things to do w/ your free time when your single and free. When you are married all it is: work, sleep, work, sleep.....work....work. And the main reason for divorce is: MONEY. Or lack of money. Don't forget most wives spend $$$ faster than they make it and not very so-contented. And if got enough friends and hobbies to get you going on a daily basis. In a long run you don't need to feel lonely at all or need a companion.

[keloph]

Originally Posted by PoundIt

it just triggers me to let the girl know more about me,

bro girls can never really understand you, just be a good man to them, and let them know some part of you which is good enough, dont expect them to know you and agree with all what you are doing.

[PoundIt]

Mr don juan - I see your point.... you're right... might at well earn more money and chiong wisely... money is always the foundation of anything...

keloph - well... if i never let them understand me, they'll end up saying that i'm not opening up to them... either way, looks like i'm screwed. hahaha

[beachboyz]

TS you're only 30 which is the prime of your life why should you be feeling so?

Enjoy your life as it is now and just let things run its natural course man.

If it's meant to be then it's meant to be.

[dominic7]

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